Why do I get horny when I’m studying?
I have a midterm coming up next Saturday. Not being enough the struggle with the subject: statistic of business, I have a peculiar habit that can really take me out of track:
Every time I’m studying at home I need to stop and masturbate.
You can laugh, but it’s real. I get extremely horny when I’m focused on a task and have a hard time getting things done when I’m at home. I was always curious about this habit of mine. Turned out I’m not alone.
I came across to this question on Quora: “Why do I become horny when I really try to focus on my studies?”. Ironically, a Brazilian cartoonist who writes about sex called Ithamar Paraguassu Ramos responded it. He said it might happen when your body is in distress and seeking for balancing and relaxation. As a strategy, your brain sends stimulus that makes you aroused, when you masturbate you liberate endorphin, dopamine, and oxytocin. These hormones make you feel calm, on balance and focused again.
I’m not sure if his answer is correct, but it makes sense. I was always intrigued by my private little ritual, I even found an article that tries to explain why one’s libido at its highest when one is trying to study, even when there’s nothing inherently sexy about the subject matter. However, none of these really convinced me. So, I came up with three theories to explain it:
Theory #1: I’m an incurable sapiosexual aka nerd
I’m a sapiosexual, meaning someone who finds intelligence sexually attractive or arousing. When I’m interacting with someone — it does not matter the gender — and the person starts talking about a topic I either don’t know about it, am curious about or am passionate about it I just get super excited. Excited to a point that I’m aroused and fantasizing about the person’s brain. It’s a trigger to make me ask about their eating habits, morning routines, workout, family…everything.
I see this behavior as an unconscious mechanism for survival. At the bottom ending, everyone is looking for a partner for life, someone smart enough to share values, overcome the hard times and perhaps raise children with. Alright, you might think I went too far. I’m just saying that in my mind, that’s exactly how it plays tho.
So, maybe I get aroused when I’m studying as a sort of appreciation of own-self. When I’m learning something new, I’m becoming smarter, thus, more interesting. It’s sort of a way of increasing my chances to exist for a longer period of time.
Theory #2: Books and sex are imprinted in my brain
I develop my sexuality at a very early age, around six I would say. Growing up, my main and only focus was school. I’m the type of nerd who used to get home after class and without even changing clothes would start doing homework. I was always obsessed with results. I wanted to see straight A’s — all the times. At this same time, I was also exploring my own body. In general, my “me-time” sessions would happen in the middle of the afternoon when I was alone at home, studying. Perhaps, the relation between studying and sex is imprinted in my brain. And that’s the reason why until now when I see a book I get tickles.
Theory #3 Studying sucks and all I want is a “fun procrastination”
That’s a more “scientific” one. I talked to the sex-therapist at Pillow Play, Kate Moyle, once about it. She explained that often when people are bored or doing something they don’t want to do e.g. revision then masturbation /sex / snacking/things that feel good can be a welcome distraction from what we are focusing on.
“It’s a fun form of procrastination”, she said.
Then, Moley kind of reinforce my two previous theory. She told me that I might have built up an association between doing that kind of work and feeling horny too. “That’s because you have done it a few times you have then started associating the two”, she said.
She also agreed that the fact that I get turned on by intelligent people can actually let me find studying arousing.
My personal solution to be more productive
Whenever I can, I go o cafés. In OC, there’s a Starbucks where everyone knows my name and preferences — which shows how often I hang out there. In Long Beach, I love going to Berlin, by Portfolio CoffeHouse — which by the way is owned by a woman who immigrated from Germany. ;-)
Studying in public makes me more efficient and focused. Plus, I see other people around me having meetings, studying, closing deals and it inspires me to get my shit done as well. It’s all about the atmosphere and the energy shared.
When I study at coffee shops I know that I won’t be able to fulfill any sexual needs, so I just concentrate in the activity I’m doing and eventually get distracted observing other people — at least I’m not laying in my bed having my “fun procrastination”.
Nothing wrong with that, but one thing at the time, right? The most important thing is to understand and respect your Odara’s spirit!
Peace & ❤ — always!
Odarize-se!
☺ If you also get aroused when studying, please share with me!
↕ I would love to find out that I’m not alone in this Universe!
☻ If something peculiar turns you on, share with us too. You might find your tribe!
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